My yesterdays are all boxed up and neatly put away
Every now and then you come to mind
'Cause you were always waiting to be picked to play the game
But when your name was called, you found a place to hide
When you knew that I was always on your side

Well everything was easy then, so sweet and innocent
But my demons and my angels reappeared
Leavin' only traces of the man you thought I'd be
Too afraid to hear the words I'd always feared
Leavin' you with only questions all these years

But is there someplace far away, someplace where all is clear
Easy to start over with the ones you hold so dear
Or are you left to wonder, all alone, eternally
This isn't how it's really meant to be
No it isn't how it's really meant to be

Well they say that love is in the air, never is it clear,
Try to pull it close and make it stay
Butterflies are free to fly, and so they fly away
And I'm left to carry on and wonder why
Even through it all, I'm always on your side

so many memories have been creeping back into the back of my mind. at least its creeping.. no longer gushing, forcing entry. partly maybe its been so long, years. or maybe i finally could let go, and just be happy with the lingering tastes. i actually haven't thought of many since i've been in london. which makes for a much lighter, happier & seemingly younger me. haha. i feel older, more grownup back here. maybe its the car. smirks.

awhile back i thought that trying to to stop the pain was to forget everything, never think of anything. but now that i've come to terms with alot of it, i realise that i will always treasure those times. the happiest week in cambridge. the warm, soothing year that wasn't filled with many spectacular things, but was love. the ups and downs of the five. haha.

you love, you live.

: always on your side :: sheryl crow & sting :
everytime i hear the lines about butterflies. i think of mel. and i want to talk to her. everyday, everynight.